Summoned
by stella-pegasi
Summary: John Sheppard is summoned for a formal meeting with General Landry at Stargate Command.  Sheppard is worried, is he in danger of losing his position as Atlantis military commander?


Title:

**Summoned**

**Author**: _stella_pegasi_

**Rating: **K +

**Genres: **Angst, drama

**Word Count: **8,492

**Spoilers: **Story set post-season five; mention of major character death.

**Warnings:** Emotional whump (only) and angst. (Occasional mild language)

**Characters:** John Sheppard, Rodney McKay, Teyla Emmagan, Ronon Dex.

**Summary:** John Sheppard is summoned for a formal meeting with General Landry at Stargate Command. Sheppard is worried, is he in danger of losing his position as Atlantis military commander?

**Disclaimer: **I do not own them; I would have treated them better.

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Summoned

_By stella_pegasi_

"Well, you certainly don't look happy."

Dr. Rodney McKay, sitting at the bench in his lab, glanced up as John Sheppard walked in and plopped down hard on a stool next to him. Rodney continued working, waiting for Sheppard's reply.

"You can tell?" Was the snarky reply from Sheppard.

"Huh…something about the short fuse, the pissed off look, and the fact you nearly broke the stool when you sat on it, that might have given you away. What the hell's got your tail in a knot."

Sheppard was silent, which caused Rodney to look up again. Sheppard's elbows were on the edge of the lab bench, his head resting in his hands. Instead of his customary sarcastic retort, he remained silent.

"OK, flyboy, what's up?" Rodney endeavored to maintain a composed voice. However, he felt an iota of nervousness regarding Sheppard's demeanor.

"I just came from Woolsey's office."

Rodney shrugged his shoulders, "So…you're in Woolsey's office all the time, what's so special about this time?"

"This time he had a communiqué from General Landry for me. It seems that I have been summoned to report to the SGC in forty-eight hours."

"Time for your annual review?" Rodney asked calmly.

Sheppard looked up at his friend, "Had my review just before we left Earth to return here. Next review is not scheduled for seven months. This time I have been officially ordered to return to Earth for a meeting at the SGC." He abruptly rose from the stool and walked toward the door. Before he exited the lab, he looked back at Rodney. "The last time I was summoned to appear before my commanding officer, I was notified of an Article 32. When the dust settled, I found myself in Antarctica."

For a split second, before Sheppard left, Rodney thought he saw a look of panic flare in Sheppard's eyes. Then he was gone. As Rodney stared at the now vacant doorway, he thought to himself, "This is going to be long forty-eight hours."

* * *

~ooOOOoo~

* * *

The last time Rodney saw Sheppard was mid-day when Sheppard dropped by the lab to tell him about being summoned to Stargate Command. As he entered the mess hall for dinner, he spotted Sheppard already sitting at a table with Teyla, Kanaan, and Ronon, who was holding Torren, playing peek-a-boo through his dreads. As Rodney approached the table, he noticed that Sheppard still looked seriously unsettled. His meal was scarcely touched, and he had pushed his chair away from the table. He failed to acknowledge Rodney when he joined them.

Teyla greeted him, "Dr. McKay, it is good to see you."

"Did you just get back from the mainland?" Rodney took the chair across from the sullen colonel.

"Yes, Rodney, we arrived back on Atlantis a few hours ago. Things are going well at the settlement, so we were able to return early." She took a sleepy, grumpy Torren back from Ronon.

Rodney, between shoveling forkfuls of mashed potatoes into his mouth, asked Kanaan. "Did Halling manage to get that water pump working? If need be, I can dispatch Zelenka, or one of his engineering goons to the settlement to repair it."

Kanaan answered, "The pump is operating quite well, Dr. McKay. Dr. Zelenka came on his own to help Halling and Donnon make the repairs. Water is now flowing freely into the village; they are most grateful."

"Good, glad Zelenka took care of that, should make life a bit easier for them." He pounced on his meatloaf with gusto. "Man, this is excellent meatloaf tonight."

Ronon laughed, "McKay, your manners suck. Don't talk with your mouth full."

"Yeah, right, Conan…like you have such great manners."

Kanaan and Ronon laughed as Rodney glared at them. John and Ronon had shown Kanaan the _Conan the Barbarian_ movie, so he understood Rodney's comment. Teyla rolled her eyes at their silliness, but noticed the fact that Sheppard was silent during the banter.

"John, you appear preoccupied this evening? Is there a problem?" Teyla asked.

Sheppard was slow in reacting to Teyla's question, so Rodney jumped in. "Flyboy's mad because he's been summoned to the SGC, day after tomorrow."

Sheppard reacted pretty quickly to Rodney's comment; his head snapping around to glare at the scientist.

"You have been summoned to Stargate Command, colonel? Why would they summon you, is it the IOA? Teyla asked.

"Don't know." Sheppard shrugged his shoulders.

"John, why would the SGC not tell you the reason they wanted you to come there?" Teyla responded.

Sheppard sprang from his chair, grabbing his nearly untouched tray. "I have no idea, Teyla. I suppose I'm in for a surprise." The colonel dropped his tray on the dishwashing conveyor, quickly leaving the mess without saying another word.

Rodney watched the colonel walk away, "Yeah, a long couple of days ahead."

* * *

~ooOOOoo~

* * *

Ronon was waiting for Sheppard at the beginning of their normal running route. It was 0510 and Sheppard was late; he was usually waiting for Ronon. Sometimes, he wondered if the colonel ever slept; too much nervous energy, Ronon thought. The Satedan was about to start his run without Sheppard, when the colonel arrived.

Ronon was leaning against the railing of the walkway; as Sheppard approached, the big man quietly said, "You're late."

Sheppard frowned, shrugging his shoulders, "You didn't have to wait." Sheppard bent over to re-tie a shoe.

"Sheppard, you get pissed if I get a few feet ahead of you, much less, start without you."

Sheppard threw him a stony glare, and took off running along the catwalk. Ronon stood for a second, watching the colonel sprinting away. Clearly, Sheppard continued to be in the same foul mood he was in the night before.

Ronon started running and caught Sheppard with ease, which appeared to aggravate the colonel even more. Most of the run was a cat and mouse game of who could outrun who. The outcome, however, was predestined. Ronon's longer stride and younger lungs put him in the lead as Sheppard started to fade. By the time they reached the finish of their pre-determined route, Ronon was out of breath. Both men were in excellent shape, but the pace Sheppard had set from the beginning of the run was faster than they were used to racing.

Ronon was breathing heavily, certainly more than he usually did. He watched as Sheppard, hunched over, hands on his knees, sucked in gulps of air.

"Feel…bet…better, Sheppard?" Ronon had one long arm stretched, braced against the wall; his chest heaving for oxygen.

The colonel looked up at him, then dropped his head again, 'No."

Ronon chuckled, "Next time you get pissed off, wait…until after we run, ok?"

Sheppard started walking around, then appeared to surrender and sagged to the deck, leaning against Atlantis. Ronon thought it appeared as though Sheppard was taking solace in touching the city.

Squeezing a substantial volume of water into his mouth, and swallowing hard, Sheppard teased Ronon, "Too much for you, big guy?"

"Too much for you," Ronon stated quietly. He wasn't teasing the colonel.

"Yeah, well…I guess so." Sheppard rested; his head against the wall, closing his eyes.

Ronon dropped down beside him, "You really worried about going to the SGC tomorrow?"

A long sigh escaped Sheppard's lips, "Yep, and I can't fathom why. I admit I feel apprehensive about being called to my commanding officer's lair."

"You don't have anything to worry about, Sheppard. It's not like you've screwed up lately or anything." Ronon observed his friend closely; he intended that comment as a joke. He, nevertheless, was unsure Sheppard would take his comment that way. Relief washed over him as Sheppard laughed.

"Yeah, you're right…not lately anyway; I just…I don't know. I've screwed up so often in my life. I suppose I'm simply conditioned to respond this way."

Ronon stood up, "Come on, I'm hungry; let's get some food." He extended his hand to Sheppard. Reluctantly, the colonel grasped it, allowing Ronon to pull him off the deck.

"You're wrong, you know. No way you're in trouble." Ronon headed off, Sheppard on his six.

Under his breath, Sheppard uttered, "I hope you're right."

* * *

~ooOOOoo~

* * *

It didn't take long for Major Lorne to resolve that it would be prudent to suggest that everyone stayed out of the colonel's way. Sheppard had stopped by his office about 0740, slouching against the doorframe. Lorne was more than a bit concerned at the morose look on the colonel's face. Moving some paperwork out of a chair, he motioned for the colonel to sit down. The colonel continued to lean against the doorframe.

"You're going to be in command for a while, Lorne." Sheppard said matter-of-fact, his expression never changing. "I've been called to the SGC for a meeting with Landry. Even if it's a turnaround, I won't be back for three weeks. However, I've decided I want to take a few days' leave, so I most likely won't return for a month. The actual timing will depend on the schedule of the Apollo and the Daedalus. Look, let's get together at the end of the day and go over what we need to review, and bring Teldy; I want her to serve as your acting XO. We'll need to meet with the team leaders, as well." He turned to leave.

"Colonel, if you don't mind my asking, why do you have to go to the SGC?" Lorne cringed a bit, when he saw Sheppard's fists clench before the colonel turned back to him.

"Will let you know when I know, major."

Lorne leaned out of his office doorway, watching his CO saunter down the hall. That certainly went well, he thought. As he rolled his chair back to his desk, he tapped his COM, calling Major Teldy to his office.

* * *

~ooOOOoo~

* * *

Teyla and Torren were on a hunt. To be more precise, Teyla was on a hunt, Torren was along for protection. Teyla felt guilt at using her son, but better that she kept Sheppard from snapping at her when she found him, if she found him. Many had reported seeing the colonel, but none knew where he was now.

Rodney had contacted her complaining that he had to deal with two of his new scientists who had run afoul of Sheppard around mid-morning. Both scientists had taken the gene therapy, and they were part of a recently arrived group of gene carriers who were learning to fly jumpers. After a few too many _Babylon 5 _references, Sheppard had run them out of the jumper bay. Both were now afraid to come out of their labs. Rodney asked Teyla to try and calm the colonel down.

She eventually decided that since the colonel had been in the jumper bay, perhaps he returned there. That is where she found him, sitting in the pilot's seat of a jumper…alone.

Sheppard spun around as he heard someone enter the jumper. From the expression on his face, Teyla was confident that without Torren's presence, she would have suffered the same fate as the scientists. However, instead of running her out of the jumper, Sheppard took Torren from her, smiling at the toddler.

"What are you doing here alone, colonel?"

"Waiting for the newbies to return for their afternoon flying lesson. I'm going to take them out for a spin around the planet." He was making faces at Torren, who was squealing with delight at each distorted face Sheppard made.

"Does that include the two scientists with whom you became aggravated this morning?"

He looked up, frowning, "McKay complained to you."

"He may have mentioned something, but I assure you, he was more worried about you than about his scientists. He is concerned that you are so 'out of sorts,' the term he used."

"Look, those two guys…uh…they just got too geeky. Gushing on about how cool the jumpers are," he glanced at Teyla, "you know, crap stuff."

The jumpers are not cool, colonel? I believe you have referred to them as 'cool' yourself, have you not?"

Sheppard peered over at her. Teyla's eyebrow was raised and her head cocked to the side. She knew very well that he had called the jumpers cool and so did he. He put his head down on Torren's, more to hide from Teyla than anything.

"Don't go throwing my word at me, Teyla. Yes, I've called the jumpers cool, and, well…they are." He peeked over at her, still not inclined to look directly at her.

"Do you think perhaps you may have been a bit hard on the new scientists?"

Sheppard had begun to bounce Torren on his knee, and the toddler was laughing, clapping his hands. Sheppard was grinning at him, ignoring Teyla.

"Colonel?"

"What do you want from me, Teyla? Yes, I snapped at those two because they were going on and on about how cool the jumpers were, and chattering on about _Babylon 5._ They were making my head hurt. So I told them to go play elsewhere, and come back when they grew up." His voice had become more and more agitated as he spoke, sending Torren to reach for his mother.

Teyla took her son, looking at Sheppard with a look of exasperation. "John, Torren loves you and is not afraid of you, and _he_ just wanted to get away from you. Two new members of Rodney's science team must have been petrified of you. I imagine they've heard about your 'exploits'; the Marines around here like to make you larger than life. So if they were already nervous about you, your current behavior must have been frightening."

Sheppard frowned, "Teyla, the Marines don't make me larger than life." Teyla looked unconvinced, "Besides, I'm not. Was I a jerk today? Well…yeah, I suppose I was. I'll get them back here for the flight.

"That is good, colonel. I am certain the scientists will be delighted to join you. Now, are you going to tell me the reason you are so upset? Are you truly distressed about going to the SGC tomorrow?

Sheppard looked away, "I…" he sighed. "I guess I'm just, I don't' know, Teyla. I like my life; for the first time, I like my life. Getting summoned to the SGC brought back a lot of memories of the time when I disobeyed orders. I do the same again if I needed to, but I would really rather not suffer through the aftermath. I'm ok; I not really worried. I don't remember doing anything to be court martialed over. I'm just being paranoid."

"I do believe you are, colonel."

Captain Waters strolled onboard the jumper, "Colonel, we're ready, sir. I'm going to board the students now."

"Waters, those two scientists…" He broke off as the captain interrupted.

"Marsden and Kimora, sir?" Waters asked, his lips curling into a slight smile.

"Yeah, get them back here. Tell them I won't bite, I promise." Sheppard was trying to look convincing.

Waters grinned, "Yes sir, I'll tell them, sir."

"We will leave you now, colonel. Have a good and uneventful flight."

Sheppard reached out and mussed up Torren's hair, smiling at him, "Looks better now."

He sat back down in the pilot's chair after Teyla left, intending to conduct a preflight check before he had to start instructing the newbies. He could hear some of the students entering the rear of the jumper. He wondered if Teyla believed him when he said he wasn't worried; he didn't.

* * *

~ooOOOoo~

* * *

Sheppard would have kicked something if he could have. Considering the way his luck was going, he assumed he would probably break his foot if he did; so he didn't. He had just come from Woolsey's office again. Landry had sent another message for him. It seems the general had neglected to inform him in the original communiqué that he would be required to wear his dress blues for his meeting at the SGC in the morning.

Entering his quarters, he flopped down on the bed; his mind racing. Was he being paranoid expecting something bad was going to happen? He didn't know. He was so conditioned to things going sour that he never considered the good that had happened. The good things were easy to identify; Rodney, Teyla, Ronon, Carson, Jennifer, Radek, Lorne, even Woolsey; his friends. More importantly, the men and women in his command meant a great deal to him. He never thought he would manage to gain their respect. Yet, they did seem to respect him. He wondered what they would think of him after tomorrow.

He rose from the bed; tapping his COM, he called for laundry detail. An airman arrived in short time, departing with Sheppard's dress blue uniform and dress shirt to be pressed. He retrieved his dress shoes and shoe shine kit out of the closet. Time to polish his black leather dress shoes to the USAF's 'spit and polish' shine regulation. If he was in trouble, he was at least going to look good.

Sheppard was sitting on the floor with his back leaning against his bed. He was putting the last buff to his shoes when the door to his quarters slid open. Startled, he jumped up, tripping over the two pair of BDU boots that were sitting next to him. He had decided to polish them as well since he had the kit out. Falling backwards over the boots, he struck the bed frame heavily with his hip.

"McKay, what the hell are you doing barging in here like that? Don't you ever knock?" He struggled up, massaging his left hip. "Damn it, you scared the crap out of me."

"Bit skittish, aren't you, for a military guy?"

"McKay, I'll ask again, what are you doing here?"

McKay strolled across the room, while he replied, "Well, you've been moping around here for the last two days like a dead man walking, so I thought you might need a last meal." He stopped in front of Sheppard's small refrigerator, opened it and pulled out the six pack of cold beer, he was certain would be inside. "Or should I say, a last beer. Out on the pier? Come on, flyboy; let's go enjoy the night sky."

Ten minutes later, they were seated on the pier, legs dangling over the edge above the dark water below. The night was balmy, a light breeze wafting the salty smell of the ocean past them. The warm amber glow from Atlantis' lights stood out brightly against the inky, star-scattered sky.

"Why are you so concerned about going to the SGC tomorrow?"

Sheppard popped a beer open, and took a long drink before he answered. "I don't know."

McKay shook his head, "Well, Mr. Cryptic, that answer really moves the conversation along."

"What the hell do you want from me, Rodney, a confession of my sins? Hell, if I knew what to confess, I'd give you one." Sheppard chugged back his beer, and opened another one.

"What I want for you to do is stop beating yourself up for everything, and always thinking the worst about yourself."

"I don't do that." Sheppard emphasized each word.

"No? Think about it, every person on who has died on Atlantis is your fault." Sheppard glanced at him, an angry look on his face. Rodney continued, "Well, that's what you tell us…but don't forget I've been responsible for a few of those deaths, Sheppard. I share that guilt."

"Rodney, I…"

"John, shut up and listen to me. I was an arrogant, egotistical, testy, snippy asshole when I got here…and…"

Sheppard interrupted, "Yeah, you were."

"Har de har har, Colonel Flyboy. The point is I was all that when I got here, and I didn't give a damn about anyone, only me, only the great Dr. Rodney McKay. So, I may be that same arrogant asshole, but I finally get it, I do care about people now. I have friends…who knew that would ever happen."

"Rodney, enough; you…" McKay didn't let him finish.

"I said shut up, Sheppard. I have friends because of you…you…stubborn, over-macho military goon, with stupid hair and a Captain Kirk personality. You wouldn't let me be an asshole. You forced me to be a better person. I think you might have whipped my ass if I hadn't gotten the message and I…"

"I'm gonna whip your ass right now, if you don't shut up."

"I rest my case, over-macho military. You need to listen."

"I am not over-macho." Again, the colonel emphasized each word.

"Yeah…right, Sheppard."

"Rodney, what do you want me to say? I'm sorry that I made you my friend? What?"

Rodney dropped his head to his chest, and took a deep breath. "Sheppard, stop doing this to yourself. You're summoned to the SGC and automatically, you imagine you're in trouble. Why? You are the one who always assures us everything will be fine. We'll get out of whatever mess we have gotten into. The last time I looked, you just saved two galaxies. I'm not certain even General O'Neill can claim that." He took a quick peek at Sheppard to make certain his friend wasn't about to push him off the pier. "What makes you think that the SGC or the Air Force is out to get you?" Rodney's voice took on a sarcastic tone, "You know you don't have to imagine that people are out to get you. You have enough people, right here in the Pegasus, out to get you for real; the SGC would have to wait in line."

Sheppard rubbed his eyes with the heels of his hands; then exhaled, shrugging his shoulders. "I don't know why I feel this way, Rodney. Maybe it's that things haven't been so dreadful for me lately. I realize we still face danger here, but for the first time in my life, I'm somewhat at peace with who I am. Things aren't perfect; there are a lot of things that I wish…uh…I just don't want it to end. Yet, every time I've been happy, every time I've cared for someone, it's all fallen apart. I can't deal with thinking about losing all of you, losing Atlantis. I don't want everything to fall apart again."

Rodney was momentarily stunned; he really hadn't expected that Sheppard would open up to him. He figured it would be just like all the other serious conversations that he'd attempted with Sheppard. They would simply tap-dance around the issues, and say things without saying them. Neither one was very good at opening up personally. Now his friend just told him what he was most afraid of, losing his friends. He started to reply, but found he couldn't talk; he was a bit choked-up. He took a drink of his beer, composed himself, and then spoke.

"John, if you're worried that any of us would desert you for any reason, then you don't know us very well, do you? I…"

"No, Rodney, I don't think that." Sheppard was very quiet.

Well, you better not, or I'll have to whip your ass, and that would most likely hurt me…a lot. Look, what I'm trying to say, is that you need to stop thinking about yourself like you did six or seven years ago. You never were the person you thought you were then. You need to stop being so hard on yourself."

Again Sheppard was quiet for a bit and Rodney, unlike his usual self, let him think. Sheppard finally spoke, " You're right, Rodney. I have no basis, no reason, to think anything's wrong; I'm just gun shy. I'll endeavor to think more positively."

"Good."

"But, Rodney, if this goes bad tomorrow…I'm gonna whip your ass."

"Bite me, Sheppard."

Sheppard laughed and reached for another beer, but Rodney grabbed the rest of the six pack away from him.

"Nope, flyboy, you need to get some sleep, and you don't need a hangover tomorrow." Rodney stood up and reached his hand out to his friend, "Come on." Sheppard gripped his hand and allowed Rodney to pull him upright.

"Do you want me to go with you tomorrow?" Rodney asked quietly as they walked down the pier.

"No, that's OK; I'll be fine."

No, really…I'll go with you."

"It's OK, really; no need."

"No John, I'll be happy to go…"

"McKay…shut up."

* * *

~ooOOOoo~

* * *

Morning dawned bright and sunny on Atlantis. Sheppard joined Ronon on their regular early morning run, had breakfast with his team, and spent time with Woolsey, Lorne and Teldy reviewing the plan for the next month. After a brief, individual meeting with Woolsey, he returned to his quarters, showered, dressed, and packed his bag. With several minutes left before he had to report to the gate, he walked over to the large window in his quarters, leaning against the wall at the window's edge. Sunlight sparkled across the surface of the water. The wind had picked up, he could see higher than normal waves crashing against the hull of the city. He thought about the stretch of beach on the mainland where the surfing was so good. If he came back, he wanted to go surfing there soon.

He was unsure why the word 'if' had crept into his thoughts. He had meant it when he told Rodney he would attempt to be more positive. Well, that pledge certainly didn't last long, he thought. He decided not to try and think about anything, to relax and enjoy the scenery. As he cleared his mind, a soothing voice reached out to him; he allowed his thoughts to drift toward her.

"_Good morning, colonel."_

"Morning, Atlantis."

"_You are leaving the city."_

Yes, I have a meeting on Earth."

"_Will you be gone long?"_

"At least a month, hopefully not more than that. But Major Lorne will be here to watch over you."

"_Major Lorne…oh yes, of course; Major Lorne will be here with me while you are away. I only wish that I could communicate with the major as we can; however, he takes excellent care of me." _

"Yes, he does." Glancing at his watch, "I'm sorry, I have to go. You take care of the people here, and yourself, while I am gone."

"_I will. Colonel, all is well; you need not worry about anything to come."_

Sheppard was puzzled by her comment, but didn't have enough time to question her about it. "Take care, Atlantis. I'll be back."

"_Yes, colonel, you will; I will look forward to your return."_

Sheppard picked up his bag and headed for the gate room.

* * *

~ooOOOoo~

* * *

Sheppard was somewhat surprised as he exited the east tower transporter, located near the infirmary, to see that the tower was virtually deserted. There were very few people around considering the time of morning. As he approached the gate room, he had expected his team would be there to send him off, but they had vanished after breakfast. He reminded himself that he had been a tad difficult to get along with the last couple of days. His friends' absence was most likely the payback he deserved.

He entered the gate room, acknowledging the Marine squad on gate duty. Glancing toward the control room, which appeared unusually crowded, he saw Chuck peering over the railing. He motioned for the tech to dial the gate. At the sound of the first chevron engaging, he faced the gate, intending to walk on through without looking back. He decided it would be easier for him that way. In the last few minutes, his resolve that all was well, had deserted him, and the butterflies in his stomach had reared their pretty little heads again.

As he waited for the event horizon to form, he realized that Rodney was standing on his left. The scientist was dressed in a dark gray suit, wearing a bright blue tie that matched his eyes.

"Rodney, I told you, you don't need to come with me."

"Huh, that's what you think, Sheppard."

"We are coming with you as well, colonel," a soft voice came from his other side. As the event horizon swooshed, Sheppard glanced to his right and saw Teyla and Kanaan, Torren in his father's arms. They were dressed in formal Athosian attire.

"What...no, you shouldn't come…"

"We're coming, too, Sheppard." Ronon said; he and Woolsey, who was wearing a navy blue suit, were now standing next to Rodney. Carson and Jennifer were standing right behind them. Sheppard was surprised to see Ronon was dressed in a pair of dark dress pants, a white shirt, and blazer, his unique necklaces slung around his neck. The Satedan reached around Rodney, tugging Sheppard's suitcase from his hand.

"What the hell is going on?"

Teyla placed her hand on John's shoulder, gently encouraging him to turn around. "John, you need to look behind you."

As Sheppard turned, he felt his heart leap into his throat. The entire gate room somehow had filled up to standing room only with Marines, airmen, and scientists. The Marines and airmen were saluting, and some of the geeks were holding up a huge sign, that had 'Congratulations, LT. Colonel Sheppard' written on it. Except the 'LT.' had the international 'no' symbol over it and the 'C' in colonel was considerably larger than the other letters.

Sheppard was extremely confused, "What…"

Rodney was grinning broadly, "Salute your military, colonel…and I do mean _colonel_. Then get your butt through the gate, you don't want to be late for your own promotion ceremony."

Sheppard returned the salute from his command. Rodney grabbed his right arm, pulling him toward the gate. As he approached the puddle, he heard the Marines' yell, "Oo-rah." As he was stepping into the event horizon, a gentle voice entered his mind, _"I told you all was well and not to worry…colonel."_

* * *

~ooOOOoo~

* * *

As he exited the gate at the SGC, Sheppard was stunned to see a large group of people gathered. At the base of the gate ramp, stood Generals' O'Neill and Landry, Colonels Carter, Caldwell, and Mitchell. Dr. Daniel Jackson, Vala Mal Doran, and Teal'c were standing behind them. In addition, there were numerous other SGC personnel; this gate room was standing room only as well. General O'Neill walked up the ramp.

"Welcome, Sheppard; surprised?"

Sheppard saluted, "General O'Neill…uh…yes sir; very…surprised," Sheppard stammered.

Looking over at McKay, O'Neill asked, "He didn't know; you didn't tell him."

McKay grinned, "Per your orders, general, not a word."

"Good, come on Sheppard; let's get this done." The general turned and walked down the ramp.

Sheppard grabbed Rodney's arm, "You knew?"

"Yes, I did; in fact, everyone on Atlantis, except you, was aware of your promotion. O'Neill threatened to have us all removed from Atlantis, or killed, if we told you. John, we were suffering watching you worry about this meeting, but we couldn't tell you."

"Rodney, I…"

"Shut up, full bird Colonel Flyboy." Rodney prodded him down the ramp.

When he reached the end of the ramp, Carter and Vala hugged him; Mitchell having to pry Vala away from Sheppard to the amusement of the onlookers. General Landry, Mitchell, Caldwell, Daniel, and Teal'c shook his hand. Sheppard was speechless. Especially when he turned around and saw how many people had accompanied him from Atlantis. He spotted Carson, Radek, Jennifer, Marie, Lorne and Sergeant Johnston as they were blending in with the crowd in the SGA gate room.

General Landry and General O'Neill approached the podium, which sat on a small flag- filled dais to the left of the stargate ramp. General Landry tapped the microphone, then called for the assembly to come to order.

"Good Morning. We are pleased you are here today as we recognize one of our own, Lieutenant Colonel John Sheppard, on the occasion of his promotion to colonel. First, I would like welcome Mr. Richard Woolsey, Expedition Director; Dr. Rodney McKay, Director of Scientific Research, also a member of Lt. Colonel Sheppard's team. The other members of the Lt. Colonel's team are Ms. Teyla Emmagan, accompanied by Kanaan and their son, Torren, and Mr. Ronon Dex. To my right, are Dr. Jennifer Keller, Chief Medical Officer, and Dr. Carson Beckett, Chief Medical Research Officer. Dr. Radek Zelenka, Assistant Science Director, and Marie Cho, Director of Nursing, are seated in the front row. Furthermore, with us today are Major Evan Lorne, Executive Officer, Sergeant Jasper Johnston, and Corporals Ramon Rodriguez, and Paul Brenner."

Sheppard was surprised hearing the corporals' names; he hadn't noticed they were part of the group that accompanied him through the gate. He looked around until he spotted them, and nodded a greeting. These two had saved his life; he owed them a lot. More than that, he really liked both young Marines. The fact they were there to share this with him was a bit overwhelming to Sheppard, but then the entire situation was overwhelming him.

"Sheppard, we were unable to invite your family to join us today, due to the slight security constraints we operate under." The guests laughed. "However, General O'Neill has written a personal letter to your brother informing him of your promotion with regrets that the ceremony was being held in a classified location. Therefore, the Air Force could not issue an invitation to him. General Jack O'Neill, Commander, Homeworld Security, will officiate at today's ceremony. Ladies and Gentleman, may I present General O'Neill.

A round of applause greeted O'Neill as he rose, and approached the podium.

"Lieutenant Colonel John Sheppard, would you please join us."

Sheppard remained somewhat shell-shocked from the unfolding events. He didn't realize O'Neill had asked him to join them on the dais. McKay intervened, spurring Sheppard to step on the platform, where he stood, in front of the flag display, next to General Landry as O'Neill began speaking.

"The last time I got to do this was when a certain Captain Samantha Carter was promoted to Major. Since she was a member of my team, that ceremony was very special for me. Besides, she's prettier than Sheppard. Despite that fact, I am honored to preside over the Promotion Ceremony for you, colonel." O'Neill looked at Sheppard, who nodded, his face slightly red.

"It wasn't all that long ago that Colonel Sheppard got his silver oak leafs. Let's see, it's been…over five years. Well, I guess it has been longer than I thought. Anyway, there were a lot of surprised people back then who wondered why he had been promoted. I don't believe many today would question that decision or this one, to promote John Sheppard to the rank of colonel."

"Mission after mission, crisis after crisis, report after report, the picture is quite clear to all of us; John Sheppard is a hero. His selfless acts of valor, his sense of responsibility for those he is charged to protect should not go unrewarded. The respect he has earned from those in his command, and those who have commanded him, should not go unrewarded. So, since we can't give him a big bonus, or a new car, we can only give him this, the promotion he deserves, and our respect." O'Neill flashed a sly grin at Sheppard, who was staring at the general, his face a mask of emotion.

"General Landry, do you hold the orders?" O'Neill asked.

"Yes, sir; I do." Landry handed the orders to O'Neill, who proceeded to read them.

"Attention to orders: The President of the United States, acting upon the recommendation of the Secretary of the Air Force, has placed special trust and confidence in the patriotism, integrity, and abilities of Lieutenant Colonel John Sheppard. In view of these special qualities and his demonstrated potential to serve in the higher grade, Lieutenant John Sheppard is promoted to the grade of Colonel, United States Air Force, effective this date, by order of the secretary of the Air Force."

"Dr. Rodney McKay, Ms. Teyla Emmagan, and Specialist Ronon Dex, would you please come forward and pin on Colonel Sheppard's new rank."

Sheppard's team came forward; Ronon bearing a dark blue leather box. He stood in front of Sheppard, as Rodney to Sheppard's left and Teyla on his right removed the oak leafs from his jacket epaulets' and handed them to Ronon. Ronon opened the box, revealing the silver eagles that denoted the rank of colonel. As Teyla and Rodney pinned on his new rank, Ronon placed the oak leafs in the box. When the eagles were secured, Teyla hugged Sheppard, giving him a kiss on the cheek. Rodney started to shake hands, but then hugged him as well. Ronon, however, grabbed Sheppard in a big bear hug, lifting him off the floor. The four teammates, friends, were very emotional, tears sliding down Teyla's cheeks.

Teyla whispered, "We are very proud of you, John."

They turn to face the assembly and posed for photos. Then General Landry announced, "General O'Neill will now administer the Oath of Office.

Facing each other, O'Neill instructed Sheppard to raise his right hand and repeat after him.

"I, John Sheppard."

"I, John Sheppard." Sheppard's voice was husky and a little shaky.

"Having been appointed a Colonel in the United States Air Force."

They continued the oath, exchanging lines: "Having been appointed a Colonel in the United States Air Force"/ do solemnly swear/that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States/against all enemies, foreign and domestic / that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same / that I take this obligation freely / without any mental reservation or purpose of evasion / and that I will well and faithfully discharge / the duties of the office which I am about to enter / so help me God."

General O'Neill shook Colonel Sheppard's hand, then announced to the assembly.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, may I present Colonel John Sheppard."

The group present applauded loudly, and from Sgt. Johnston and the two young Marine corporals, loud oo-rahs. Sheppard was looking decidedly sheepish and embarrassed.

General Landry gave the audience a few more seconds of celebration, then he spoke. "Colonel Sheppard, would you like to say a few words?"

Sheppard didn't move. He was unsure of what to say to these people, or if he could say anything. This time, when he hesitated, Ronon pushed him, and Sheppard went stumbling toward the podium.

As everyone laughed, Landry smiled, "I take that as a yes, colonel."

Sheppard stood behind the podium for a few seconds, his head down. Then, gripping the edges of the stand, he raised his head to look at the faces of the people he cared so much about.

"Five years ago, I left the SGC aboard the Daedalus, stunned that I had just been promoted to Lieutenant Colonel. Elizabeth…uh…Dr. Weir teased me about my referring to my new rank a few too many times during the first part of that voyage." A slight smile flashed across his face as he thought about that moment. "I remember sitting in the mess late one night having coffee with her. I told her that she had to understand that there were a lot of people in the Air Force, who never thought I would make it past captain. Wonder what they would think about today? I…I don't know what to think about today."

"I know that I have Dr. Weir and General O'Neill to thank for giving me the opportunity to serve on Atlantis. I owe them more thanks for having confidence in me that I could do the job. The fact is, I could never do it alone. My team, the men and women in my command, the scientists…my geeks…I wouldn't be here without them, and neither would a lot of you." He paused, trying to remain composed. "I'm not very good at this…uh…I have come to think of the men and women of Atlantis and of the SGC as family. I…"

Sheppard hesitated, his voice breaking, overcome by the sea of emotions reflected on the faces staring at him. He saw his team, the expedition members who came with him to share in his promotion ceremony, many with tears trailing down their cheeks. He inwardly smiled as he realized that Beckett was crying the hardest. There were the members of the SGC, Carter and Mitchell, especially, both beaming at him; there to share this with him. He knew he couldn't continue to speak; he would end up embarrassing himself.

"I am…humbled and appreciative of this honor. Thank you."

Sheppard was visibly shaken; Teyla, followed closely by Rodney and Ronon, ran to him. She hugged him, Rodney and Ronon did as well, as the gate room erupted in applause.

General Landry took the podium again. "Ladies and gentlemen, this concludes the ceremony. Please come forward and offer your congratulations. Lunch will be served in thirty minutes in the mess."

Landry turned to Sheppard, "Colonel, just so you know, I'm in a hundred percent agreement with your promotion. I was mistaken five years ago. You deserved the promotion then, and you undoubtedly deserve this one now." Landry extended his hand.

"Thank you, general." Sheppard shook Landry's hand.

"Now, go take your bows, colonel."

General O'Neill was waiting for him. "Come on, there's an empty lab this way; let's talk."

He followed O'Neill as quickly as he could, while stopped by well-wishers along the way.

When he finally entered the lab, O'Neill was sitting on a stool beside one of the benches. Sheppard made his way over to him, sitting on a nearby stool.

"Why didn't you want me to know about this, general?" Sheppard asked.

"Because I wanted you to sweat a little," O'Neill smiled, a bit self-assured, "and you did, didn't you, Sheppard?"

The newly promoted colonel leaned back, elbows on the lab bench, long legs stretched in front of him. "Yes, sir; you could say that. I remembered being called to my CO's office years ago, and told I was under an Article 32. Not one of my favorite days, but I knew it was coming. I did disobey orders. Being summoned to the SGC felt like that, sir."

"Yeah, I wager it did. I, also, bet you went over every little action or decision that you've made in the last five years, trying to figure out what might have led you to be summoned to the SGC. Right?"

Sheppard cocked his head to look at the general, not moving his body. "You already know the answer to that, sir, I suspect you been in this place before."

O'Neill tossed his head back, an amused look on his face, "Not much gets past you, does it, _colonel?"_

"Sir, so, why _did_ you decide to keep me in the dark about this?"

"Because, this was a chance to pay something forward, I believe is the term. Years ago, I spent a long evening with General Hammond, and a few six packs of beer. I was in one of those frames of mind; kicking my own rear end for letting people die. No matter what the circumstances of their deaths were, it was always my fault. At least, that's what I thought." He sighed, then continued. "General Hammond kicked my ass that night. The good general told me I was wallowing in self-pity, and had a strong over sense of my position within the universe. I wasn't all that important." O'Neill paused, watching Sheppard's face. The newly minted colonel seemed lost in thought, but he knew Sheppard was paying attention. "I wanted you to think about things; second guess yourself, like I knew you would. Then maybe you would see that always expecting the worst is not always a good thing. That you really had nothing to worry about."

Sheppard sighed, "Second guess myself, sir? I triple and quadruple guessed myself."

O'Neill nodded, "And did you think of anything that warranted you being in trouble?"

Sheppard didn't answer; he just shook his head no.

"Exactly, colonel, and I should also remind you that you are not responsible for everything that happens, good or bad. You aren't the most important man in the universe either."

"Yeah, well, I've been told that before, general."

"Female, right?"

"Yes, sir." Sheppard grinned.

"Yeah…me, too." O'Neill stood up, and Sheppard followed suit.

"Come on, colonel, let's go rejoin your party; just about time for lunch. I understand they're having cake. I like cake."

They were about to walk out the door when O'Neill paused, turning back to Sheppard. "John, you've done a hell of a job on Atlantis. You deserved this promotion."

Sheppard was surprised at O'Neill's words, but he managed to reply with a simple "Thank you, general."

As O'Neill continued through the doorway, he said, "Hell, Caldwell didn't even complain, said it was about time. What the hell did you do to him?"

* * *

~ooOOOoo~

* * *

Sheppard continued to be embarrassed during lunch as, one after another, people stood up to offer a toast to his promotion. Some of the comments, he admitted, had been pretty funny. Although he felt especially nervous when Caldwell rose to give a toast, but the colonel had only wished him well. An enormous cake with "Congratulations, Colonel Sheppard" was rolled in for dessert. After he cut the first slice with Sgt. Johnston's donated Ka-bar, the cake disappeared quickly; General O'Neill consuming a rather large piece. Finally, he had a moment to himself, and he looked around for his team.

Rodney was huddled with Dr. Lee, both scientists complaining about some physicist whom they seemed to dislike, instead of sniping at each other as they usually did. Teyla was chatting with Dr. Lam, Vala, and Sam, who was holding Torren. Kanaan was sitting at the table next to him, talking with Dr. Jackson. From the snippets of conversation he could overhear, Jackson was asking Kanaan about the Athosian culture.

Ronon was the one who intrigued John the most. The Satedan warrior was sitting across the room engaged in conversation with Teal'c. They had greeted each other warmly when the Atlantians arrived. Sheppard was pleased to see Ronon so open and friendly with someone besides the team. He had always suspected that Ronon had been a gregarious person before the horrors he endured with the Wraith. Now it appeared that Ronon was beginning to feel comfortable enough to remember who he used to be. From what he knew about Teal'c, the Jaffa would be an excellent mentor for Ronon, one warrior to another.

John leaned back in his chair and thought about General O'Neill's words. Jack O'Neill was the one person who understood the pressure he felt, because O'Neill had traveled along a nearly identical path. He wondered if the general had really been able to stop blaming himself for every death on his watch. John wasn't certain that he could, but he would try not to allow the guilt to consume him. He suspected that he wouldn't be anymore successful than O'Neill had probably been. After hearing O'Neill's story regarding General Hammond, he wished he had been privileged to serve under Hammond. He had the opportunity to meet General Hammond on a couple of occasions, and had been impressed with the man's honor and wisdom. Sheppard grinned; besides if he could command O'Neill, surely he could have commanded one Colonel John Sheppard.

Sheppard's expression turned from grin to somber as one person entered his thoughts; the one person who was not present to share this day with him…Elizabeth. The person he was today, he owed to her. Chance may have brought him to her and the expedition, but she made him a part of it. There were times when the ache of her loss seemed more than he could bear, but John knew that people died, combat taught him that. His mother's death taught him that people who were loved died. A tiny piece of John Sheppard died the day his mother did, another little piece died when Elizabeth did. At least he knew both women had been proud of him, and would be proud of him on this day.

"Well, you look a bit too serious for the occasion."

John looked around to see Rodney plopping down in the chair across from him. "You and Lee figure out how to eliminate your competition?"

Rodney snorted, "Lee was at a physics symposium, and ran into an old colleague of mine who we both despise. Seems this idiot has some new energy theory that is _so_ totally off the wall. However, he managed to sell the idea to some energy think tank. He's now getting mega funding for doing bogus research. I'll just have to take some spare time and debunk his theory."

John laughed, "That's spirit, McKay; don't get mad, destroy."

Rodney glared at him for a second, then asked, "So, why the long face?"

"Just thinking about some things; people not here." John didn't look at his friend, but Rodney knew what was bothering him.

"She would have been really proud of you, John; but she wouldn't have been surprised. She believed in you all along, even when you didn't believe in yourself. She even believed in me. We were both lucky to have her in our lives for what little time we did."

"Yeah, I know." John was ready to change the subject, "So, did you enjoy keeping this a secret from me?"

A look of apprehension crossed Rodney's face, "You aren't mad at us, are you? I mean, O'Neill told us not to tell you."

John waited a second before he answered, just to let McKay sweat a bit, "No, Rodney, I'm not mad."

Rodney puffed out the breath of air he had been holding in, "Good." It was his turn to pause before he continued. "We were all having issues not telling you. We knew something good was about to happen to you, something you deserved, but you didn't. Teyla, Lorne, and I really stressed out about how you were reacting, but Ronon was really pissed. Told us he almost told you yesterday morning, but figured Teyla would hurt him if he did." Both men nodded in agreement, Teyla would have hurt him. Rodney asked, "You're OK with this?"

"Yeah, I'm OK with this, Rodney. I wouldn't have had this happen any other way."

"Good. So, you playing golf with Mitchell and O'Neill this afternoon?"

"Yeah, Mitchell warned me to let O'Neill win; says the general buys more beer that way."

"Since we all have a week's leave before the Daedalus departs for Pegasus, Teyla wants to show Kanaan around San Francisco, then maybe visit some other places. Want to join us?"

John thought a minute; he had considered going to see his brother, but since he was suppose to be in a classified location at the moment, he probably should save that trip for another time. He nodded, "Yeah, sounds like fun."

Rodney got up to leave, "So, we will see you at Carter's this evening. She throws a mean cookout, and everyone will be there."

"Rodney, you've never been to a cookout at Carter's, have you?" Rodney looked a bit sheepish, but shook his head no. Sheppard laughed, "I didn't think so."

"Bite me, Sheppard."

Sheppard decided it was time to find Mitchell, and get their golf game underway. He walked out of the mess with McKay.

Before they parted, Rodney commented, "Sheppard, you should be promoted more often; this is fun."

"I doubt there will be any more promotions in my future"

As Rodney walked away, he grinned, "I wouldn't be so certain about that, _Colonel _Flyboy."

_The end…_

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Author's Notes:

I hope you were as surprised as Sheppard was at why he had been summoned to the SGC. The idea of it being time for Sheppard to receive a promotion had been rattling in my head for a quite a while so I decided to write this little fluffy story.

Most of the actual promotion ceremony was taken from a guideline written by an Air Force officer as a tool for other ceremony planners. The verbiage of orders and oath are taken from that guideline. I eliminated the exact date of the orders which would normally be given, replacing it with 'effective this date.'

Hope you enjoyed, I would love to hear from you. Thanks so much for taking time to read this; I really appreciate it.


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